Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Wednesday's Questions (on Tuesday)*

Sunday night, Dad told me I needed to call the doctor and tell him Mom needed more warfarin. My folks live 2 miles from the doctor's office. They pass it each day on the way to McDonalds. Dad won't call or stop by for 2 reasons. One is valid ~ he has trouble hearing. The second reason ~ he gets mad and cusses the staff. He always says I get more information from them than he ever does. (That's because I'm polite.)


Monday I called, left a message, and the nurse returned my call. She mentioned that Mom should be taking 2 mg of the drug. When I talked to Dad, his prescription bottle contains 1 mg pills. So now the question became how much should Mom take last night? Dad went with his original prescription, which called for one pill with 1 mg strength. He told me to call the office again.

This morning was Cate's preschool program. I told Dad I would drive down after the program. (They live 35 miles from me.) He told me not to come all the way just for that, just to call. I had already planned to visit them Wednesday.

Click to view

After the program, I spoke with the nurse. I called Dad to tell him the new information and that I would pick up the new prescription in the morning. His reply: Pick up dilantin as well. No thanks from him.
 Person with question mark

Then, these questions:
What have you found out about Machu Pichu? This is a trip he wants us to take next May. I've picked up brochures, but I need to call a travel agent.

 http://0.tqn.com/d/webclipart/1/0/I/N/desert1.gif - 8.2 K

Have you made us a reservation in WV (for a family reunion in July)?  No, I haven't.

fam16.gif - 3.5 K

I know they're not funny questions like in this post http://grammygoodwill.blogspot.com/2012/05/i-think-im-back.html but it's so frustrating and it literally paralyzes me to where I can't do anything. I feel so overwhelmed.

Last, he said he had choir practice tomorrow at 4. I told him that was a problem because I really wanted to be home for choir practice (at my church).
His replies: Well, I know that but you didn't come today, and now you have choir practice, and then you keep the babies, so that doesn't leave much time. Okay, good bye.

I'm not kidding. I just want to scream.

While I was writing this, the nurse called me back to tell me Mom isn't due for a refill on her dilantin. I'm hoping that Dad tried to fill her monthly pill container, and that is why he thought he needed more. I may have to take over this duty for him.

Thanks for reading this diatribe.**
     **diatribe -  a bitter, sharply abusive denunciation, attack, or criticism:

*This is too funny. I glanced at this post and noticed that I had titled it Wednesday's Questions, but today is TUESDAY. See what I mean. My dad can make me crazy.


Michele @ The Nest at Finch Rest said...

I cannot imagine this frustration, but I do hear variations on it many many times.

My Mom died in her 50s and Dad died at 62, 6 years later. Neither of them got old enough to get crotchety....but, still.....consider it a spritual challenge, and pray REALLY HARD about it every time it happens.

Maybe God is just calling you out on it and wanting to see how you handle it.

Pray pray pray and see if it doesn't make you feel better?

At the very least I am praying for YOU and yours............because frustration and stress hurts us when we keep it inside eating at us.

Thank goodness we have our blog buddies to lean on when we need them, huh?

Lean away, sister friend.

Hugs - very big hugs.


Debby said...

I can feel your pain. My mother is like this. She is demanding and feels so entitled. I know that sounds a bit rough bt it is so true. And all the time I get told that I don't have time for her. So not true. Good luck. Just a nice thank you would be nice.

my thrifty closet said...

hehe..it just goes to show that our parents have aged. My dad is like that too. He doesn't "bother" me as much because he thinks I have two kids to manage but he will call my sister countless times to ask the same questions over and over. And drove my sister insane. I guess as people age, their level of comprehension also deteriorate. Sometimes we also wonder if we will become like my dad when we grow old. It's hard with aging parents. May God give you strength and patience to take care of your parents, I think you are a very good daughter, that's why your parents are so dependent on you.


Oregon Gifts of Comfort and Joy said...

Hi Grammy! Welcome back, I am so glad that you are blogging again. I put you back on my sidebar so now I won't miss out on the latest news.

It sounds as if your Dad is managing you and that you are doing your best to manage him managing you. It also sounds as if he wants to keep you engaged with him on a daily basis (my MIL does that too, but she is nicer about it). I suppose the whole situation can't be changed, but you can speak up about needing to hear the magic words every once in a while: please and thank-you from your Dad. And I hope that sometimes you let him go to voicemail when you are in the middle of something.

You are the best daughter.


Kathy M.

Angie said...

So glad you're writing. Feels good, huh? I love you.

Melissa said...

I have been a housekeeper for a few elderly ladies who behaved much the same way. Not quite the same situation, but I can certainly relate! You are in my prayers, Grammy, and I'm so glad to see your blog posts again! It really does help to write about life sometimes, doesn't it? ♥

Cindy The Victorian Journey said...

I know it must be hard for you. Once a parent always a parent. They forget to say thank you. They expect things from you. But know in your heart that your a good person doing a great job. They probably thank God every day for you. They just forget to mention it to you.

Shannon@Cozy Home Scenes said...

Grammy, it's so nice to hear from you and have you back where you belong! I'm so sorry that you have problems with your parents. I know from following your blog that you are a funny, kind and giving person. I think that some elderly people get depressed from the problems they face from failing health and perhaps from the fear of losing their spouse. I guess they don't think a thank you is necessary when they are dealing with so many changes in their lives which makes them irritable. It would be nice to hear words of appreciation but deep inside your dad knows you are a special daughter for looking out for their needs. Maybe your dad can't bring himself to say what you want to hear but I'm sure everyone that knows you including your blogging friends thank you for your honesty and for being a responsible daughter even when it is sooo difficult. I will join the others in praying that things will get better for all of you.
We care about you very much. ---------- Shannon

Wsprsweetly Of Cottages said...

I didn't live near my parents in their last days, I was a couple of hours away, so that the daily issues were shouldered by my little sis. I drove down a couple of times, spent the day and took my mom to the hospital..but didn't go through what you are going through. I remember my sister being SO frustrated and at her wits end. Also..OUR own mother went through it with her own parents..
Will I be that way..MY GOD, I hope I don't cause my children frustration...
I know it does not help that others are going through the same thing..but they are! The good thing with me is that there are seven to share the burden if I ever get so needy.
Truthfully...I'm scared. I really am. I will be 76 shortly... Thus the shoes ..but now I could fall and break a (blanky blank) hip!! :)
Hugs to you darlin' and hang in there. Come here and complain away. It's hard to get elderly and infirm and dependent..and it's just as hard to care for them.

Kim @ Cheap Chic Home said...

Hi Grammy--I guess we're both "back" to an extent. I am taking care of my mom since my dad died--the medications can make me crazy. She's only on a couple, but complains about everything and swears she gets every side-effect!

Debbiedoo's said...

Grrr...it's OK to feel that way, of course it is. We are only human. Hang in there...You are a great daughter, and your parents are so very lucky to have you!